Project Breastfeeding: COMPLETE

That's Correct! I have stopped breastfeeding just shy of 10 months! This is a big deal to me because it finally concludes a chapter that lasted 10 months. I have had several ups and downs in the breastfeeding department that have contributed to my many post partum complications. I have just published a post containing all my trials and obstacles of post partum. If you are looking for something to read, I invite you to share in the misery :)

I did not post it as a new post because it is extremely graphic and I want to give people the warning choice to venture forth with the truths on their own.

In the past recent months, I struggled with how I would stop nursing Jackson. I didn't want to be the one to stop doing it if I felt he still depended on that closeness and comfort. Rather, I would prefer it to be his choice to move on. I had a difficult time in the beginning of Operation PUJ because he was not taking the bottle nicely. He would just play with the nipple top and not really be interested in what the bottle offered. However, at the same time he wasn't showing greater interest in the breast either. Over the past 4 weeks, I have slowly started to wean the breast as he has taken to the bottle much better now. When he sees it being prepared, all of the sudden that's the only thing that matters to him. Our very last nursing session, he only gave it 5 minutes and he was done. I felt good about that. He wasn't desiring it like he used to. That told me, we were ready to stop.

But what I have recognized lately, is Jackson's extreme attachment to his dad. When he hears Paul's voice when he gets home - jackson speed crawls to the door and almost starts to hyperventilate, desperate for Paul to pick him up. Then, he won't my husband put him down. When I am holding him - he reaches for Paul. This is bittersweet. I have not idea if the weaning has any part in this sudden attachment for his father or not. But it's great to see Paul's face light up when his son wants to be with him so badly. On the other token - it kind of makes me feel like scraps. I don't like the feeling when Jackson reaches for someone else when I am holding him. Rejection from your 10 month old sucks!

All in all, I put in a wonderful effort to my task at hand. I feel accomplished at it and now jackson will be fed all the expressed milk that I had stored from day one. He is going through the supply faster than I thought and it might not take him quite to 1 year - but we'll just start cow's milk a tad early then :)

Even though this counter will forever say 9 months 4 weeks and 1 day, my son will be 10 months in two days and to me - that says 10 months of breastfeeding!